Prior to reading, you may want to put on your tinfoil hat.

Corporations transform real resources provided by Government into imaginary wealth, partially returned to Government.
Churches transform imaginary wealth into imaginary salvation (confidence in afterlife).
When Corporations require more real resources, the Church transforms imaginary salvation into real soldiers provided by the Government who will attack other Governments' soldiers to acquire said resources.

Socio-political history has been a continual refinement of this cycle of perpetual war, starting with basic stuff like chiefs instructing their shamans to rile up the warriors into invading the neighbors' hunting grounds to modern equivalents like making billion dollar deals with the Saudis to provide weapons systems that will be used against us in the next war to acquire petroleum products.

Interestingly, none of this requires any intentional behavior beyond simple desire to get a leg up on the competition. No vast conspiracies, secret societies or alien overlords needed. Just the basic behavior of greedy, manipulative organisms with a propensity for communication by series of grunts and whistles.

I don't know what is interesting about basing nominations on primaries in each state. I've lived in 10% of the US states and visited 66% of them and the only thing they differ in is the amount of grime on the freeway billboards advertising Olive Garden. Here is a schedule that should provide some fantastic political pandering:

January 31, 2008 - Presidential candidates, but you can't vote for yourself and you have to say who you voted for and why. 100 delegates.

February 3, 2008 - People not watching the Superbowl. 3 delegates.

February 21, 2008 - People who have actually used the phrase "A credit to his race." 200 delegates.

March 12, 2008 - Illegal aliens. 200 delegates.

March 23, 2008 - Calvinists: given the pre-determination thing, this could end the process right here. 5 delegates.

April 21, 2008 - Red Sox Nation: You can't tell me this special interest group is any more annoying than South Carolina. 25 delegates.

May 25, 2008 - Mouth breathers. 500 delegates.

June 3, 2008 - People with whiplash from trying to follow candidates' positions on controversial issues. 100 delegates.

June 5, 2008 - People with nausea from listening to platitudes about non-controversial issues: "Inside every human being there are treasures to unlock." 100 delegates

Here are some stats mined from Google results:

	foxnews.com	cnn.com	npr.org	foxnews.com	cnn.com	npr.org
pages	158000	951000	173000	100.00%	100.00%	100.00%
black	34600	171000	24100	21.90%	17.98%	13.93%
obama	9230	14100	2740	5.84%	1.48%	1.58%
black obama	1220	2610	2010	0.77%	0.27%	1.16%
black panther	313	430	207	0.20%	0.05%	0.12%
black panther obama	10	32	8	0.01%	0.00%	0.00%
islam	4740	22600	2120	3.00%	2.38%	1.23%
islam obama	359	498	75	0.23%	0.05%	0.04%
radical islam	2600	2720	274	1.65%	0.29%	0.16%
radical islam obama	186	175	1	0.12%	0.02%	0.00%
osama	1340	45900	1730	0.85%	4.83%	1.00%
osama obama	29	532	12	0.02%	0.06%	0.01%
affinity(obama, black)				13.22%	18.51%	73.36%
affinity(obama, islam)				3.89%	3.53%	2.74%
affinity(obama, radical islam)				2.02%	1.24%	0.04%
affiinity(islam, radical islam)				54.85%	12.04%	12.92%
affinity(obama, black panther)				0.11%	0.23%	0.29%
affinity(obama, osama)				0.31%	3.77%	0.44%

affinity(A,B) = X% means that when A is mentioned, B is also mentioned X% of the time.

As a bleeding-heart/gums liberal, it dismays me that NPR is so ultra-focused on Obama's blackness. I surprises me not in the least that FoxNews cannot mention 'Islam' without throwing in 'Radical' alongside. I'm surprised that CNN is the most interested in the osama, obama link.

Lots of pontificators trying to figure out how to explain 2 things lately:
1. How come Shawn Merriman's use of steroids is not causing the same Congressional hearings/hand wringing/vilification as McGwire, Bonds, Sosa, et al.
2. How come we elect admitted cheaters into the baseball Hall of Fame (Perry, Ford, et. al.) but want to keep the steroid monsters out?

So here's my pontification:

It is entirely a matter of degree. Gaylord Perry used the spitball as one of his pitches in order to maintain a high level of performance as a starting pitcher over a number of years. Shawn Merriman used steroids to be one of the best linebackers in the game today. McGwire, Bonds and Sosa used steroids to completely rewrite baseball record books. They didn't break the home run record, they annihilated it. Bonds drew 200+ walks, had a 0.600 OBP and an 0.800 Slugging percentage. It's not unprecedented, it's unfathomable. If Perry used the spitball to record a sub-1.00 ERA and win 46 games a season, you wouldn't be seeing his mug in Cooperstown today. If Merriman broke the sack record by 10 sacks, he'd be sitting out all of 2007 and maybe beyond. I don't know what's right or wrong, but I know what's going on. McGwire, Bonds, et al. exhibited no common sense or taste in their cheating and are paying for it via a public that infrequently shows any common sense or taste themselves. Other factors are in play, such as the perception that the NFL had a steroid policy prior to 2006 and the hallowedness of baseball statistics within the fanbase, but these are paltry compared to the action-reaction that such blatant and thorough results of cheating caused.

Really, I do. But I preferred Tip O'Neill's style as speaker of the house. I mean, act like you've been there before. Even if you haven't. Does it get me kicked out of MoveOn.org if I say that?

KC @ Indy
I love the potential for two Manning playoff loses on consecutive days. How cruel is it that a whole family qualifies for overrated status? Peyton doesn't play run defense, but neither did Marino, and he took much of the blame when the Dolphins couldn't win a ring. At least he got them past the AFC championship game once. If P.Manning has as much authority over the offensive playcalling as he is reputed to have, he clearly doesn't recognize that keeping the ball for 6 minutes and scoring a field goal 60% of the time can be more effective than keeping it 90 seconds and scoring a touchdown 40% of the time when your defense is going to give up 250 rushing yards to any serious opponent. The X-factor is that Herman Edwards at first didn't and later couldn't keep Larry Johnson from breaking the single season carries record. Like the single season saves record, there's a reason the same athlete doesn't hold both that and the career mark as well. LJ's body will probably have enough left to get through Indy, but by round 2, he's got to be completely exhausted, and next year he will have to be this year's Shaun Alexander. Pick: KC.
NYJ @ NE
This will be the best-coached game of the playoffs. Too bad the loser has to go home so early. Obviously, New England has all the right things going for it, but any outcome is possible here. Pick: NE.
SEA @ DAL
Neither of these teams should see the second round of the NFL playoffs. Can this game be -7 to -10? Can we give Chicago two bye weeks? Pick: Dallas.
NYG @ PHI
How can the NFC East put 3 teams into the playoffs? Ugh. At least with this game and the NE-NJ game, the number of 'East Coast Bias' teams will go down 40% and we will be saved from at least some of the Bristol Home Field Histrionics™. Pick: Eagles.

I can't believe they're actually going to have the new ballpark by 2008! Having purchased season tickets early and often, I am at the head of the list for seat selection at the new place. No idea what prices will be like over there. Now we just need to keep drafting Zimmermans and Corderos. There's not a bad history of drafting for the Expos/Nationals in the past 10 years, but they were never able to keep them around. Hopefully this will change with the Lerners/Kasten/anti-Bowden:

1996: (1) John Patterson, SP, high school - Went to Arizona for some reason, but ended up back in the organization and should do pretty well as a middle of the rotation guy.
(2) Milton Bradley, OF, high school - Only played a little with the team. Takes risks, but also takes walks.
1997: Bad year for the Expos - 8 1st round picks (many compensatory), no contributors.
1998: (1) Brad Wilkerson, OF, college - Quite good. Traded for Alfonso. Injured and ineffective in Texas. Alfonso is obviously no longer with the Nats, but for the years they had after the trade, no comparison.
1999: (2) Brandon Phillips, SS, high school - least embarrasing part of horrid trade with Cleveland, giving up Phillips, Grady Sizemore, Cliff Lee and Lee Stevens for Bartolo Colon, who, after half a season with the Expos, was traded for Orlando Hernandez who spent the year injured and left as a free agent. Thank goodness we at least got some entertainment from his brother Livan.
2000: (3) Grady Sizemore, OF, high school - see above
(4) Cliff Lee, SP, college - see above
2001: Doesn't look like anyone from this year is going to make an impact
2002: (11) Jay Bergmann, SP, college - may pan out as reliver or back of the rotation starter
2003: (1) Chad Cordero, P, college - probably not destined for a long career, but a very competent closer
2004: (1) Bill Bray, P, college - might make an impact in Cincinnati, but was part of the deal that got us Kearns and Lopez, so we'll see.
2005: (1) Ryan Zimmerman, 3B, college - I have a sinking feeling he'll always be in David Wright's shadow, but he should be a cornerstone of this franchise for years to come. No idea on other picks from this year.
2006: No idea, but we drafted a shortstop named Stephen King

It looks to me as if the Nats should probably listen to their college and high school talent evaluators and tie their GM's hands behind his back. If we made no trades, we'd be stuck with Wilkerson and Vidro, but we'd have Lee, Stevens, Sizemore and Phillips.

But I don't really know how to format them well here. Anyway:

Best awkward '80's movie nudity. Awkward either in the sense that the producers just felt they had to toss some boobies in there, or that the movie is a PG-13 showing as much as it possibly can at the time to avoid an R:

10. The Woman in Red
9. Wall Street
8. Flashdance
7. All the Right Moves
6. Breakfast Club
5. Blue Thunder
4. Police Academy
3. Weird Science
2. Trading Places
1. Just One of the Guys

Top 10 people you always forget about when you are remembering others in their oeuvre, (parenthetical oeuvre):

10. Minnie Minoso (great post-war outfielders)
9. Peter Lawford (Rat Pack members)
8. Terry Jones (Monty Python members)
7. Bob Backlund (WWF Champions)
6. Jeff Lynne (Traveling Wilburys)
5. John Prine (The Next Dylan)
4. Dave Krieg (Top 10 Career Touchdown Passes)
3. Tristan Tzara (Trendy French Philosophers)
2. Brad Dexter (Magnificent Seven)
1. Bill Fitch (Top 10 Career NBA Coaching Wins)

Biggest letdown revelations in recent pop culture:

10. Fifth Element - it's love, man!
9. Time's 2006 Man of the Year - lazier than a college newspaper filler item.
8. Deep Throat - some random FBI guy when it could have been Haig or Kissinger.
7. Dallas Dream Season
6. Geraldo opens Al Capone's vault
5. Smoking actually does cause cancer
4. McGwire, Sosa, Bonds were on steroids
3. Johnny Carson replaced by Jay "Treading Water" Leno
2. Fundamental particles cannot in fact be precisely located and measured at the same time (neither recent nor pop culture, but a huge letdown for positivists, reductionists and determinists everywhere)
1. Whatever the final backstory of Lost ends up being

This is modeled after a website that does baseball chat room parodies.

As the Red Sox prepare to unload Manny Ramirez' final 2 contract years on the always-ready-for-an-aging-DH S.F. Giants, the Internet is abuzz with rumours of who's in play:

* Manny for Cain

* Manny for Lowry and prospects

* A 3-way with Atlanta where the Red Sox get Matt Cain and Andruw Jones, the Braves get prospects and the Giants get Manny.

* Atlanta gets Lowry and Crisp, Boston gets Jones, the Giants get Manny.

Any way this breaks down, the Giants' average age is going to be over 33 and the Red Sox will have rid the team of every significant contributer to '04 except Schilling, Wakefield and Varitek. If they ever do get a deal done with Matsuzaka and sign JD Drew and Lugo, the Manny deal will put them into uncharted waters for clubhouse dis-unity.

After another deer in the headlights performance by a Manning, Giants fans must be beside themselves knowing they could have Philip Rivers, Shawn Merriman and Nate Kaeding if they hadn't made the deal for Manning. That doesn't mean New York's GM would have picked those players, but Eli's prima donna refusal to play for San Diego should have been some kind of warning. It's just not possible in the salary cap era to have princesses and win.

Let's see:
St.Louis election officials asking for photo IDs, even though the state banned that requirement. St. Louis is a Democratic stronghold within Missouri. Other precincts' officials were not asking for photo IDs.
Denver election machines were "broken" for most of the morning. Denver is a Democratic stronghold within Colorado. Judge denies extending Denver voting hours to compensate. Other precincts' machines were working fine.
Utah precinct reporting 5 more eligible voters than total people living in the area, including 16 adults living in the Republican candidate's home.
Macackenstein (R-Va) automated calls to Democratic voters' residences telling them that the voting had been moved, delayed and/or that they could be arrested at the polls.
Ehrlic (R-Md) fake sample ballots passed out to confuse Democratic voters. Ehrlic bused in homeless people from Philadelphia to pass them out.
It goes on and on...
I certainly hope that with Democratic control of the House, somebody organizes a thorough and rigorous examination of all this stuff. When I was growing up, everyone knew about Chicago and Kennedy political shenannigans, but this is 4 elections in a row where almost every interesting race has had something shady going on from the Red side.

I like that one.

Fantasy basketball is off to a stuttering start. I have been playing the absolute worst kind of strategy these first few days - Leandrinho Barbosa and Quentin Richardson both had the best games they'll have all year over the past 2 days and I picked them both up immediately afterward, replacing Danny Granger and Andrea Bargnani. My only defense is that it looks like my two new guys will be getting lots of minutes on their teams, and Raymond Felton, Speedy Claxton and Shaun Livingston are my point guards, and none of them have gotten serious minutes yet. While they're still working themselves into their teams' rotations, I need some players who will put up minutes. Go figure that they happen to be a point guard on Phoenix, who already has Nash, and a shooting guard on NY who already has Starbury and Francis.

Pigskin this week:
Atlanta (-5.5) @ Detroit
Seems like a low spread. Vick probably only needs 12-15 pass attempts in this one.
Cincinnati @ Baltimore (-3)
Cincinnati ought to win a game like this, but they are way too inconsistent to pick.
Dallas (-3) @ Washington
Tony Romo vs. Jason Campbell. Yippee! Maybe Washington finally figures out they've got a running back and takes control of this game. Yeah, that's the ticket.
Green Bay @ Buffalo (-3)
Buffalo will have already played all 4 NFC North teams after this game. I think they make it 2-2 with a win.
Houston @ NY Giants (-13)
Big spreads have been working better than usual this year. Parity is available in the economic structure of the NFL, but you can't legislate good management skills. Giants.
Kansas City @ St. Louis (-2.5)
KC and St. Louis are both totally unpredictable, but in a toss-up AFC vs. NFC, I'll take the A.
Miami @ Chicago (-13.5)
This is not a toss-up. Bears.
New Orleans (-1) @ Tampa Bay
Can New Orleans follow their first home loss with a division win on the road? If so, they have a good shot at a long playoff run in the NFC.
Tennessee @ Jacksonville (-9.5)
I don't like the size of the spread on this one. Tennessee has a variable running game that I think clicks this week.
Minnesota (-5) @ San Francisco
Boy things look different when you're facing Alex Smith and Mike Nolan instead of Tom Brady and Bill Belichick. To Minnesota's credit, they did identify the Patriots' basic strategy and react in at least two different ways during Monday night's game. Many teams would have stubbornly 'stuck with what got us here.' Of course it looks as if Bill had marked that game as a 'must win' for whatever reason, and that means that not only does he have the perfect game plan going in, but he's already planned for the next 3 moves you're likely to make.
Cleveland @ San Diego (-12.5)
I like large doses of the running game followed by a stiff defense. One of these days, though, Marty-ball is not going to be able to cover these big spreads.
Denver @ Pittsburgh (-2.5)
This is it for Pittsburgh's post-season chances. I don't think they can do it, but it will be a close one.
Indianapolis @ New England (-3)
If New England wins this, they have home field advantage in the AFC. Obviously, they have the Bears in 3 more weeks and lots can happen, but thanks to Indy's win in Denver, the situation is pretty clear. It's not possible to pick against the Patriots given their recent dominance in this rivalry, but this could be an all-time great game. Manning vs. Brady every year, usually once in the regular season and once in the post-season is a treat people don't appreciate enough. Imagine if Montana and Marino had squared off 12 times during the primes of their careers instead of just once.
Oakland @ Seattle (-7)
Oakland has shown some defense the past couple weeks, but eventually someone's going to figure out that they've got Ken Walter at QB and simply shut them out. It might not be Seattle, however, who are going to be resorting to the practice squad for skill positions soon.

I seem to have skipped a week.
Arizona @ Green Bay (-4)
Objectively, Arizona should be able to win this game, but last week's loss to Oakland (!) and the fact that a team from Arizona will be playing in Wisconsin conspire. Look for Jennings to get a lot of action as Rolle will shut down Driver.
Atlanta @ Cincinnati (-3.5)
Between these two, there might not be 20 players without arrest warrants. I like Atlanta's running game.
Baltimore @ New Orleans (-2)
The under/over is 37 and that seems high to me. It's not smart to pick against New Orleans at home.
Houston @ Tennessee (-3)
Gack. Tennessee has a legitimate running game, so I'll take them.
Jacksonville @ Philadelphia (-7)
Philadelphia needs to get going and Leftwich is still iffy. I like the Eagles.
Seattle @ Kansas City (-6)
KC has been completely unpredictable without Trent Green. Seattle has been pretty predictable without Shaun Alexander. My fantasy team had both of them. KC.
San Francisco @ Chicago (-16)
Let's say Chicago is on their way to covering in the 3rd quarter. At that point, why is Jauron going to waste his starters' playing time and/or his best coaching tricks vs. SF?
Tampa Bay @ NY Giants (-9)
Seems a bit high, but the Giants should still pull it off.
St. Louis @ San Diego (-9.5)
St. Louis scores too much for this game to be so lopsided.
Indianapolis @ Denver (-3)
A loss by either of these teams helps my Patriots' chances. I fear Denver more, so I'll pick Indy.
NY Jets @ Cleveland (-1.5)
I don't understand this spread at all. J-E-T-S Jets Jets Jets. Anyway, the two head coaches are the last two New England defensive coordinators, so I'll take the under as well (38).
Pittsburgh (-8) @ Oakland
Oakland ruined my dream of an 0-16 team this season. I still can't imagine picking them to cover anything.
Dallas @ Carolina (-5.5)
Welcome to the Tony Romo era.
New England (-1.5) @ Minnesota
This is a much more important game for the Vikings than it is for the Patriots. I see Minnesota winning.

I know nothing about the NBA, but I thought I'd give fantasy basketball a go just in case. I joined an 8-team league so no one has to depend on 6th men and random Eastern Europeans with an insufficient number of vowels in their names. My draft strategy was 'I've heard of him lately,' so I still ended up with a random Eastern European with an insufficient number of vowels in his name:

PG:Raymond Felton,Speedy Claxton,Shaun Livingston
SG:Dwayne Wade,Michael Redd,Luol Deng
SF:Rashard Lewis,Danny Granger
PF:Tim Duncan,Carlos Boozer,David West
C:Nenad Krstic

My point guards are all 'upside' guys that are ready to be their teams' go-to players but haven't really proven much at this point. I have almost no 3-point shooting, but that should help with the field-goal percentage category and be a wash overall.

Random dribblings today, but this was too good to pass up. I went to public school during the Reagan administration, and most of the teachers behaved like this because the educational system was regarded as wasteful coddling of the future homeless and funded accordingly. I see from the date that this one took place during '90's, so I guess those kids aren't much better off. I wonder if today's students are not getting left miles or kilometers behind?

You might be able to make a case that the first guy had it coming, but now this?